New Yorkers piss me off
There are, pretty much, two sorts of New Yorkers.
The first is the sort that doesn’t really want to be in New York City, but feels they have to be there for their job or their friends or whatever. They sort of regret being in New York but don’t see a better option, or perhaps are okay with it, but only because x, y, and z and, you know, it’s not so bad. These people are mostly pretty cool.
The seconds is the sort that likes New York. These people, realizing that actually liking New York is not a naturally tenable state for a sane human mind, compensates by insisting that not only do they like New York, New York City is the best place that has ever existed in human history, everything is always better in New York, and if you don’t see that you’re clearly an idiot—which, obviously, you are, because you’re not in New York. These people piss me off.
Fortunately, should you meet a New Yorker, the universe, in its circuitous but often helpful way, has provided an easy way to distinguish these two sorts right off the bat, with one, simple question:
“Yankees or Mets?”
The correct answer, of course, is anything else.
